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Well I suppose this just goes to show that different things affect people differently. Personally, I'd prefer to be stuck in public transport for an hour with a breastfeeding mother sitting 2 feet from me, than a screaming child.Quote:
Originally posted by Isaviel
What does a mother do that doesn't breast feed and runs out of formula? The baby screams then too until there is food. So taking time to get somewhere private shouldn't be a big deal.
Sorry, Isaviel, but the law is on the nursing mother's side in this in America. See http://www.lalecheleague.org/LawBills.html for details by state.
The mother should be mostly covered in any case. Even if she doesn't have a special nursing top, she can wear a big T-shirt and just lift up enough to get baby to breast. But why should she be banished to some back closet or bathroom? Heck, more women's breasts get exposed every Spring Break or Mardi Gras parade.
And you just can't pump as much milk as a baby can nurse. It's a second best solution.
PS: Yes, Ismenia, it's La Leche League.
You speek the gospel of truth. Preach on Brother Graeblyn!Quote:
Originally posted by Graeblyn
I really have a problem with the belief that everyone has to go out of their way to avoid offending people. There comes a point when sensitivity, political correctness, social conformity and the like becomes suffocating, and I think, unfortunately, we reached that point in the U.S. long ago.
But, honestly, my question is: What comes next?
Personally, I'd rather live in a world where I have to ignore and deal with what -I- beleive to be obscene, then to live in a world where I have to live my life according to what everybody ELSE beleives to be obscene.
Both our kids were exclusively breastfed for the first 6 months.
With the first, my wife was awkward and shy about making sure she was covered up with a blanket, and not showing any boob. That lasted for about 2 weeks, then she said, fuck this, and just started feeding the baby when it was feeding time.
She is very discreet and you can't see anything unless you make a real effort to look, in which case, have fun, if nursing mothers' breasts do it for you, get your kicks how you can.
The one thing she says that I think is hilarious - she is more worried that people will see her 'fat rolls' than her boobs. That is her big concern now.
Of course, we're not Americans, so maybe poeple here are just a little more tolerant.
*jabs all the Yanks as they walk past with looks of horror at his child getting fed
EDIT PS
Anyone who gets 'grossed out' by breast milk has some serious issues to overcome. That is what breasts are designed for, believe it or not, to make milk, the whole toy during sex thing is a happy afterthought.
It's okay Elidia. I'm just stating how I feel about it. I never expected anyone to agree with me. It still doesn't change how I feel about it.Quote:
Originally posted by Elidia
Sorry, Isaviel, but the law is on the nursing mother's side in this in America. .
Yes they do make breast pumps which can work for some people sometimes. Some babies won't take to a bottle at all though and will only nurse. Then there is the issue that pumping can throw off your whole nursing schedule. I know for me, if I pumped for later and then the baby needed fed soon.. I had reduced milk. And then when you do feed the baby with the bottle and you don't nurse, you are engorged with milk which is really painful and embarrassing if you are leaking all over the place. (yes they make nursing pads, but they don't always do the trick. ) You could pump off the extra milk, but that is a pain especially if you are in public! I know this is probably TOO much information for some, but hey I just wanted to explain how it works.Quote:
Originally posted by Isaviel
But they do make breast pumps. Can't people just bottle it if they know they're going out in public? The whole idea behind it is that it's healthier right? I mean I can understand if a child won't take to it but I don't know.... just never been comfortable with it and I think where it may be unfair to a nursing mother it's also unfair to others that don't want to be around it. *shrugs helplessly*
I do understand it. I didn't breast feed and I'm well aware of the pain and the leaking and the embarassment of it.
My wife had real problems with a pump. She breast fed for the first month and it stopped the "leaking" sopping wet frontage, which made her nipples even more sore.
In response to this social stuff thats been banded around, well its society thats made breast feeding in public a taboo. As stated thats what there for, and baby gets the best of both worlds, comfort, better bonding and nice fresh baby milk.
To Quote Graeblyn :-
"I really have a problem with the belief that everyone has to go out of their way to avoid offending people. There comes a point when sensitivity, political correctness, social conformity and the like becomes suffocating, and I think, unfortunately, we reached that point in the U.S. long ago."
This is true, but a modicome of politness and self control is all that is needed. At one point i was walking out of peoples way, dodging around folk in crowds, people that just couldnt be bothered to be polite, and i thought why am i bothering, no one else is, there all barging one anouther. But i had to think on what it would be like if no one did bother about other people, not pretty at all. We have to strike a medium and use common sense, i call it self accountability, and as with all these stupid law suits, its sadly lacking nowadays.
I am 100% for breastfeeding in public in places that are appropriate. It really has nothing to do with putting the baby first for me. I just believe that breastfeeding is the most natural way to feed the baby, so people should not be made to feel uncomfortable about it.
Having said this, I do think that a person should always try to be accomodating of others if she can do something as easy as wear appropriate clothing or just use the baby blanket to cover up. Most people aren't bother by the THOUGHT of a baby breastfeeding. It's just the sight of a boob that makes a lot of people uncomfortable.
At the same time, I would be really upset if I was being discrete and was asked to move to a bathroom or something. Bathrooms aren't a comfortable place to breastfeed, and I would NEVER eat in a public bathroom. It's just too dirty. Thus, I wouldn't want my baby eating in one and me having to do all sorts of contortions to be able to feed in a tiny stall.
Well I've never had babies or breast fed but personally I would never whip my boobs out in public. I guess I'm just too private for that. I've seen mothers nursing a baby in public before and it didn't bother me...it just seems natural.
Then again there are a lot of "natural" things we don't do in public that I -would- be offended by if I had to witness, so I respect that others might be more sensitive and I think it is necessary to be discreet out of courtesy to others. That's part of living in civilized society with other people: showing consideration for others by respecting social taboos even if it infringes upon perceived/imagined personal freedoms or 'rights'. It's really not so bad and not even a sacrifice when you consider the tradeoff. So the attitude: "Fuck what other people think, I'm doin' things my way and damn them all if they're offended" isn't really acceptable to me.
Yes there are always cases that necessitate breaking social taboos, like Malacasta's public transportation example, and in those cases, people understand. The possibility of *gasp* !seeing boobies! is not as horrific as dealing with a squalling brat on the bus. Honestly if I was a mother in that situation and I did have a blanket or something to cover up with, I wouldn't hesitate at all to take care of it because the alternative is even more uncomfortable.
And as for the mother washing out her breast pump in a public food prep area...yes that thought is disgusting, for me too. I find it revolting because breast milk is a human body fluid. It's just as unsanitary as taking a cup full of spit or some other human fluid and dumping it out in a sink that other humans have to use and the fact that it was a food prep area makes it even more stomach-churning. Now maybe breast milk is germ free, I have no idea, but given what I've heard about the importance of mothers who breastfeed taking care of themselves for the sake of their baby's health, I doubt it. And even if it was perfectly sanitary, I think I'd still get grossed out by it, again just out of an ingrained fear of coming into contact with other peoples' body fluids.